Frozen Drinks
Summer Breezes Summer Freezes
By Su-Jit LinEvery region has its signature frozen drink to help cool you off each summer. In my hometown in Long Island, our concoction was a good old-fashioned Slurpee from your local 7-11. However, here in the Big Easy, we do things a little differently - a little better. Or in this case, a whole lot better. Our finger-numbing, condensation dripping, ice chip-infused drink of choice is the daiquiri.
This beverage has become a household name here in America, and bastardized throughout the country as recipes evolved to the corner of the land the concept traveled to. The original is said to have been invented around 1905 by a group of American mining engineers near Santiago, Cuba, at a little bar named Venus by the area’s beach and iron mine. The distinctly un-American name? Taino in origin.
Back in the day, the preparation of the drink used to involve a tall glass packed with cracked ice, sugar, lime, and plenty of rum poured over the top. Basically, it was an alcoholic snowball with bigger ice pieces, if you will. As time went on, it became a drink that was shaken with shaved ice, until finally, it evolved into the frozen cup of fun we all know and love.
The frozen daiquiri is essentially pulverized ice, liquor, and whatever the hell flavor the providing establishment feels like putting out. At national chains, your choices are usually strawberry, banana, or pineapple.
But the daiquiri we spoiled ones here on the Gulf Coast are accustomed to come in way more exciting and way more flavors. Every daiquiri purveyor in our fair city boasts rows and rows of machines spinning like single-hued clothes dryers and churning out luscious smoothie-like concoctions in every possible flavor. You can as easily get a Bellini as a White Russian as an Amaretto and Pineapple in this form; creative names mask interesting drinks such as the Blue Bayou or Crawgator, and most intriguing to the adventurous is the mysterious 190 proof red fruity one found under different labels in every shop. The only problem with such a wide selection is – which flavor? Mixing and matching in the same cup is allowed, but going overboard isn’t recommended, especially if you’re on the go.
On the go? Well, ironically … yes. Drive-thru daiquiri stands are a phenomenon located randomly throughout the suburbs surrounding New Orleans and many other parts of Louisiana. This is an anomaly pretty much exclusive to our wonderful state and is a fantastic, jaw-dropping fact of life to demonstrate to people from out of town. Individual to gallon sizes are available at the windows, and clever, clever Southerners have found a way to skirt the pesky issue of the state’s quiet request to “Please don’t drink and drive” – a phrase that sits discreetly in the corner of Louisiania licenses. In a society of champion drinkers, daiquiris are considered a pregame refreshment rather than an actual drink, and lawmakers agree, as demonstrated by a lovely little clause in LSA 32:300 – “…’Open alcoholic beverage container’ shall not mean any bottle, can, or other receptacle that contains any amount of frozen alcoholic beverage unless the lid is removed or a straw protrudes through the lid.” In short, don’t poke the straw through and you’re golden.
For other to-go drinks, the law gets a little fuzzy. Frozen margaritas, famous for their taste and content, are a beloved big drink that’s often grabbed on one’s way out, half full and still delicious. One of the most popular beverages nationwide, this tequila and lime concoction is twice as nice blended with cold ice, and the chunkier texture keeps drinkers from chugging, which will avoid the usually resultant headache from too much sugar and straight dehydration in New Orleans’ sweltering heat.
Hot at the heels of the frozen margarita is the popularity of the Pina Colada, immortalized in song and reminiscent of nights among white sands and swaying palms. Well, we may not have the stretches of beach and the levees off Big Muddy are the closest things to an ocean breeze, but (imported) palm trees are here in abundance, and plenty of bars will churn out this tropical invention. And speaking of the mighty Mississippi, the frozen Mississippi Mud Pie (also a dessert) is a decadent way to cool off, with its chocolate high notes accented by cold coffee and cream, Amaretto sweetening the drink with just a hint of almonds. The more easily found Mudslide is similar, incorporating ice cream, Bailey’s, and vodka rather than the Mud Pie’s rum base. Creamsicle-inspired frozen drinks also make great finishers, if chocolate’s a tad heavy for you.
Don’t be intimidated though - cold drinks don’t have to be that complicated. Sometimes, a frozen rum and Coke will do. Or maybe a spiked Orange Julius. Or even a classic strawberry daiquiri. But when the time comes to pick your poison to combat smoggy, all-encompassing heat and humidity, don’t forget your options aren’t limited to liquor with ice cubes. Catch a chill this summer and let your brain freeze. It’s too hot to use it anyway.